Making Things Better: Lessons learned in the trenches shared to help you develop strong communities.
Have you ever walked into a room where no one acknowledged you? Maybe it was your first day at a new job or attending an event where you don’t know anyone else. You may not remember much about what was said that day, but I bet you remember how it felt.
Now think about the opposite. Someone smiled, introduced themselves, saved you a seat, asked where you were from, and included you in the conversation. Within a few minutes, you felt like you belonged.
Over the years, I’ve come to believe that one of the simplest and most overlooked, yet powerful, leadership skills is choosing to be welcoming.
I’ve spent much of my career helping organizations improve projects, teams, and processes. Along the way, I’ve learned something that reaches far beyond project management.
Making things better isn’t always about improving processes. Sometimes it’s about improving experiences.
One welcoming conversation can change someone’s entire experience, and sometimes it can even change the direction of their journey.Everyone Wants to Belong
Everyone Wants to Belong
A while back, someone attended one of our PMI Mile Hi New Member Orientations. She came expecting to learn about the chapter and maybe meet a few people, but she got a lot more bang for her buck. She saw volunteers who genuinely enjoyed serving. She learned about the many programs we offered. She felt the excitement and energy in the room and immediately felt like part of the team, because she felt WELCOMED.
A short time later, she reached out and asked if I would be willing to be the keynote speaker for her nonprofit organization’s annual conference. She wanted me to share what we were doing at PMI Mile Hi, talk about my leadership philosophy of making work “fun and easy,” and explain how we had built such an engaged volunteer community.
During the conference, I was told the experience she had with our chapter made such a positive impression that they were trying to implement some of the same ideas within their own organization. Yes – just one meeting and a keynote speech did that. After the keynote, she came up to me with a big smile and asked if she could volunteer with our chapter.
Think about that for a moment. She didn’t volunteer because of a membership brochure or a marketing campaign. She volunteered because of an experience of feeling welcomed.
Never underestimate the impact of making someone feel like they belong.
Welcome Creates Participation
Another experience taught me a different lesson. As part of our annual symposium, I’m responsible for building the core leadership team. One year, I asked a volunteer to step into the Speaker Lead role. Not everyone agreed with my decision because his communication style had rubbed some people the wrong way. Several team members questioned why I would put him into such an important leadership position. A few were pretty vocal about it and very direct.
I understood their concerns, but I also saw something else. I saw someone who cared deeply, worked hard, and had the potential to do a great job if given the opportunity. I simply asked the team to give it some time. After all, teams don’t instantly become high-performing. They have to form, storm, norm, and eventually perform.
A few months later, the conversations completely changed. The same people who had questioned the decision were now talking about how responsive he was, how organized he was, and how much he cared about helping our speakers succeed. He became one of our strongest leaders.
That experience reminded me how easy it is for all of us to carry biases based on first impressions or past experiences. Being welcoming doesn’t mean ignoring differences. It means choosing to look beyond them.
It means giving people the opportunity to become who they’re capable of becoming. Sometimes the person others hesitate to welcome becomes one of the greatest contributors to the team.
Welcoming Is Contagious
Culture doesn’t happen by accident. When leaders are welcoming, teams become welcoming.
When volunteers are welcoming, new members become volunteers.
When organizations are welcoming, communities grow.
And when Project Managers are welcoming, client satisfaction, internal teams, and projects have a higher chance of success.
People tend to repeat what they experience. If someone was welcomed when they arrived, there’s a good chance they’ll welcome the next person who walks through the door.
That’s how cultures are built. Not through mission statements hanging on a wall. Through everyday actions repeated consistently. Things that may seem small to you rarely feel small to the person receiving them. Things like:
- ● A smile
- ● A handshake.
- ● An introduction.
- ● An invitation to join the conversation.
This lesson was especially apparent a few weeks ago when I attended the first annual PMI North American Presidents Conference in Washington, DC. I walked in knowing a few people and walked out feeling like I had made more lifelong friends.
The atmosphere was energetic, but what stood out to me most was how welcoming people were. Leaders introduced themselves and pulled others into conversations. Someone always seemed willing to make room at the table or connect you with another person you should meet. Both in word and deed, they made it clear that I, and everyone else there, belonged.
It reminded me that leadership can be as simple as noticing the person standing alone. Maybe you invite them into the group instead of assuming they’ll find their own way in. Or maybe you choose to believe in someone before everyone else does.
None of those moments will show up on a project plan, meeting agenda, or status report. But they may be the moments people remember most.
I know I’ll remember how I felt leaving that conference. Think of PMIs strategic framework M.O.R.E. – Manage Perceptions, Own Success, Relentlessly Reassess, and Expand Perspective. This framework is nudging PMs to be leaders going beyond tactical project management. Good project managers will grow into leaders that need to be welcoming to a variety of stakeholders. The more we are welcoming, the more impact we will have.
If someone leaves a meeting, an event, or a project thinking, “I’m glad I came today,” you’ve accomplished something far more meaningful than checking another task off the list. You made their experience better. And in my book, that’s great leadership.
I’m thankful for the PMI Mile Hi board and volunteers which are welcoming and that makes the community better. I’d love to hear from you. Who made you feel welcome when you needed it most? How has that experience shaped the way you lead others?
Until next time, keep making things better.
James McCoy
